First 40 Days: Why This New Mom Opened a Postpartum Hotel (2024)

“The First 40 Days” is a term often used to describe the newly postpartum period, during which your body is healing, your hormones are shifting rapidly, and you are navigating the significant identity changes that accompany new motherhood or introducing a new sibling into the household. Full of tears, joy, struggles, and successes, no two postpartum experiences are alike. But just because postpartum is a unique experience for everyone, it doesn’t mean there isn’t inherent value in sharing, normalizing, and learning from each other. In the latest installment we sat down withJulia Grace is the CEO and founder of Sanhu House.

Julia grew up in a family of nurses and hospitality professionals. She started her career in not-for-profits and her mission in life is to make life-improving medical services more accessible. Prior to starting Sanhu House in 2022, Julia worked at Open Society Foundations, one of the largest grant making institutions in the world. She recently gave birth to her first child and shared what is taught her about improving postpartum care.

Julia: Before motherhood I considered myself akin to the Korean sporty spice - I identify with athletics as a form of extracurriculars over arts when it came to the American schooling system framework and grew up snowboarding, skiing, playing basketball, and even skateboarding. I grew up in the bay area, near San Francisco, until highschool then left for the east coast for my education and was there for all of my adulthood up until recently when I moved here to Santa Monica in 2022! While being on the east coast, in NYC, I found my calling in the nonprofit space, specifically in public health. Then and now I find myself inherently drawn to creating access to basic needs as humans to live a happy and healthy life.

Since having my daughter less than two months ago, my focus now has been 50/50 - motherhood and launching my company, alongside prioritizing my own wellbeing; a challenge I am working through.

Julia: During the pandemic, I observed my cousin’s pregnancy journey - she was born and raised in Korea and all her family besides me were there. She was afraid of not having support after she gave birth; and it took me by surprise – for the first time, after researching and delving into options to look for postpartum care for her here in the US.

I realized how lacking America’s postpartum care options were and how the US is completely failing families, especially compared to other wealthy nations.

My cousin’s mom (my aunt) had been working as the Director of Infant Care in one of Seoul’s largest luxury postpartum care centers and my cousin shared how much she wished that care existed here. That was the lightbulb moment for me. Inspired by Sanhujori, the traditional Korean ethos of personalized postpartum care, I felt compelled to start the first of this offering in Los Angeles.

Julia: Americans are not good at relaxing and generally speaking, don’t value physical well being in the same way Asian cultures do (in my opinion).

Since ideating this company and working in the postpartum and maternal health space, I was frustrated seeing women and new mom friends who didn’t do all they could to relax and get their bodies to regenerate and recover after birth - I saw a lot of my friends being amenable to their partners and families who wanted to visit and therefore didn’t allow for the down time that I thought was necessary, or I saw friends who didn’t stop doing chores around their house, or didn’t take a break from work, etc.

I promised myself I wouldn’t be like that. That I would take my postpartum recovery seriously and do 40 days of full rest and only bond with my baby so that I could get back to a physical, chemical, emotional, and mental equilibrium as quickly as possible.

I didn’t take my own advice. I soft launched my company, which opened the second week after I gave birth. The needs of others ultimately transcended my own needs.

I allowed my family and my partner’s family to come stay with us because they wanted to witness our new baby - their grandchild.

To this day, six weeks postpartum, my cesarean incision is inflamed, I’m dealing with postpartum depression, and hormonal imbalance. My body is far away from what I believe is “full recovery”. I believe the window of acute recovery looks like the first 6 weeks, but I didn’t give myself that sacred time that I needed and wanted and expected to let my body heal. America’s system and culture does not give women time and space to have and be postpartum positive; and therefore even though I think of myself as an independent and individual thinker - it was too difficult to go against the tides of everything and everyone surrounding me, including myself.

Julia: Every stay is considered and intentionally planned for the birthing parent’s needs, however Sanhu House guests can always expect a program that prioritizes rest and nervous system regulation, a menu tailor-made for restoring a postpartum body, certified feeding support, bodywork such as postpartum massage, a maternal mental health guidance + group sessions centered in creating community.

While I was a guest at Sanhu, I didn’t have to lift a finger. I literally had one of our doulas - who is a [female] football player - woman handle me and carry my full body to help sit me up, because I had no core strength. She put the breast pumps on me so I would not have to reach and strain my incision area. The food delivery was clutch. I had breakfast, lunch, and dinner in bed.

My feet and legs were so swollen so I had a postpartum lymphatic drainage massage. I remember when I checked in, my feet wouldn't fit into my slippers. When I checked out, thanks to the foods I ate and massage, I felt more whole in my body again - and I could fit in my slippers!

Latching and milk production wasn’t working for me in the beginning. The doula support there was HUGE. I would have felt lost without that. They gave me breast massages, baby positioning for better latching support. I also really appreciated spending time with other mothers in the mothers lounge when I felt up for socializing.

Julia: Probably not launch a company! I would also have less visitors and really allow myself to go into a sanctuary and disconnect from everything and everyone outside of my nuclear family.

Julia: For me, pelvic floor exercises and core strengthening were what I really focused on during pregnancy. I found the Every Mother app was great to help guide me in those practices. Every person is different, so I don’t think there is a one size fits all. However, creating a plan of support that helps to nourish our bodies and our emotional well-being is key.

Julia: To be completely vulnerable here, the most challenging parts of postpartum are my hormones, mood balancing, and sleep! All of which are interconnected. My entire pregnancy, I thought I would solely formula feed so I could prioritize sleep, but once baby Ocean came, I completely submitted to what the most acceptable arrangement of feeding a baby is.

Explicit and non-explicit messaging to breastfeed is everywhere. I have ended up exclusively breastfeeding since. I’m sure many moms can relate to feeling the pressure of performing “perfect motherhood”. I’ve finally allowed myself to now explore formulas for my mental health - so I can have time back for myself. I value sleep over everything, because I value getting better. I guess this is a longer answer to say that mothers should not feel guilt about making a “mother first” choice - whatever that may look like. I was feeling torn between two great options, but finally came to realize that prioritizing myself, physically and emotionally, is what is best for me and my baby.

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Paula James-Martinez, Filmmaker and Editorial Director

Paula James Martinez is a creative producer, filmmaker, and former fashion editor. She is the director and producer of film company Semi-Retired Productions, and in 2018, started working on her directorial debut on the documentary Born Free, which investigates the truth about birth and maternity in America. She has since founded a non-profit organization The Mother Lovers to raise awareness of the US maternal health crisis.

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First 40 Days: Why This New Mom Opened a Postpartum Hotel (2024)

FAQs

What is the 40 day rule postpartum? ›

In the Middle East, resting 40 days after having a baby is customary in Jordan, Lebanon, Egypt and Palestine. During this 40-day period, someone comes to the house or stays with the new mother to take care of the baby, the house and the other children, so that all new mothers have to do is rest.

Why are first 40 days important after delivery? ›

In Ayurvedic medicine, there's a saying that goes, “Forty Days for Forty Years.” Essentially, this means that what the new mother does during her first 40 days postpartum will define the next 40 years of her life, specifically her health. That's why many consider the first 40 days postpartum to be the fourth trimester.

What is the concept of the first 40 days? ›

"The first 40 days" is a term often used to describe the newly postpartum period, during which your body is healing, your hormones are shifting rapidly, and you are navigating the significant identity changes that accompany new motherhood or introducing a new sibling into the household.

What happens after 40 days of a newborn? ›

As your baby leaves the "newborn phase" in the first 6 weeks to the "infant stage," you may notice many changes. Nursing frequency, sleeping routine, and length of feedings all change. Infants may only nurse every three or four hours during the day and can sleep up to 5-6 hours at night.

What is the first 40 days of tradition? ›

The first 40 days post birth, also known as the 4th trimester, is a very important time for the mother to heal from her pregnancy and birth. Cultures all over the world utilize very specific traditions and recipes during this time.

What is the first forty days the essential art of nourishing the new mother about? ›

The book features 60 simple and delicious recipes formulated to support the unique needs of the new mother as well as guidance on essential emotional factors that influence the early months of motherhood including building your support team, navigating inevitable relationship challenges, and honoring the rites of ...

What is the blessing for 40 days newborn? ›

In the fulfillment of the forty days, wash away from her every transgression, voluntary and involuntary, so that accounted worthy to enter Your holy Temple, she may glorify with us Your All; Holy Name, of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, both now and ever, and to the ages of ages. Amen.

Why 40 days are important? ›

Forty is typically indicative of a time of testing, trial, penance, purification, and renewal. In the New Testament, forty days is the length of Jesus' time of trial in the desert in preparation for his public ministry, proclaiming the Gospel.

What does the Bible say about 40 days after birth? ›

The Book of Leviticus states that a mother should be considered unclean for 40 days after giving birth to a boy and for 80 days after giving birth to a girl. The scene shows a mother in bed eating, surrounded by women and children.

What is the 40 day baby milestone? ›

By the time you reach 40 days, you will have your baby figured out. You will have an idea why he is crying, will know which winding technique works and will how to put him to sleep. Although it may feel like forever while you are going through it, the time actually passes very quickly.

Why is 40 days special? ›

Today, we still ascribe importance to 40 days and 40 nights. In Christianity, the period between Lent and Easter is 40 days (excluding Sundays). It is a time of holiness, when Christians remember the sacrifice of Christ and explore their own continuing process of sanctification, or becoming more Christ-like.

What happens 40 days after giving birth? ›

The 40-day period is called the lochial period, from 'lochia' the normal vagin*l discharge of cell debris and blood after birth. The Bible says “40 days” for the vagin*l discharge resulting from involution and can also be described as the red lochia, lasting 4–6 weeks [29].

What is the 40 day tradition for birth? ›

In Latin American cultures, the first 40 days after having a baby is traditionally known as la cuarentena, a time for new moms to rest, recover, and focus on breastfeeding while the women in their communities provide housekeeping and other support.

What can a 40 days baby see? ›

Babies this age can focus on shapes that are close by, but see distant objects as blurry because they are nearsighted. As babies grow, eyesight improves.

What happens after 40 days of pregnancy? ›

Embryo at 40 days (7 weeks after the first day of the last menstrual period). At 7 weeks, the embryo's head is much bigger than the rest of its body. Its arms begin to form as the elbows and hands appear. The fingers are still fused together.

What is the purpose of 40 days after death? ›

The 40 days is an opportunity for judgment before God. It's believed in Eastern Orthodox religions that the soul completes many obstacles known as the aerial toll houses. The soul passes through the aerial realm, which is home to evil spirits.

What was the event of 40 days? ›

Jesus spent 40 days in the desert wilderness before he began his public ministry. During those 40 days, Jesus was tempted by evil to sin in ways that are common to all humanity in this fallen world. Mark 1:13 mentions that Jesus “… was in the wilderness forty days, being tempted by Satan.

What is the Greek word for 40 days? ›

The one which is honored by the majority of the Greeks is the Sarakosti fasting (Lent) about forty days before Easter. The word Sarakosti means 40 in Greek. During the Sarakosti people restrain from eating meat, dairy or fish but they are allowed to eat seafood.

What is the significance of 40 days in Hinduism? ›

In Hinduism when someone dies, the family of the deceased are given 13 or 40 days space (length of time depends on caste and community) until they are reintegrated into society. Amongst Hindus it also common for a mother and child to rest for 40 days after the birth during which neither leaves their.

What is the 40 day bonding with the baby? ›

"The First 40 Days" is a term often used to describe the newly postpartum period, during which your body is healing, your hormones are shifting rapidly, and you are navigating the significant identity changes that accompany new motherhood or introducing a new sibling into the household.

What is the 40 day rule after birth in Islam? ›

As reported in a number of hadiths, following child birth, women during the time of the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) were in the habit of setting aside forty days as the period of nifas (postpartum bleeding), during which time they refrained from performing ritual Prayers, fasting, reciting the Qur'an, ...

What were the first few days after birth like what kind of changes happened with you and the baby? ›

It is normal to feel a rollercoaster of emotions after giving birth. There is often a dip in mood around the third or fourth day after your baby arrives, also known as the 'baby blues'. These feelings are very common and can be due to changes in hormone levels, breastfeeding, lack of sleep and fatigue.

What is the 5 5 5 rule for postpartum health? ›

The 5-5-5 rule in postpartum can help new mothers manage their wellbeing. It suggests taking five days in bed, five days on the bed, and five days around the bed, to be sure you're getting adequate rest. The first five days are intended for a mother to rest in bed, and have skin to skin bonding time with the baby.

How long is your body considered postpartum? ›

How long is the postpartum period? No matter how you delivered your baby, the postpartum recovery period is generally considered to be the first six weeks after childbirth. This doesn't mean that at six weeks you'll magically bounce back to pre-baby condition.

Can a baby go out before 40 days? ›

The idea that babies have to stay inside the house for several weeks after they're born is FALSE. In fact, as long as your baby is healthy, getting some fresh air can be great for mom and baby if you take a few precautions. First, be careful not to overdress or underdress your baby when you leave the house.

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